With the Hallmark Horror of a Holiday, aka Valentine’s Day, right around the corner, many tend to become fixated on what to do or what to get for their special someone. While we all should be treating everyday like Valentines Day, other things in life tend to become the priority. Valentines Day does not need to be a pocket breaking, stressful, or extravagant event.
This Valentine’s Day, try something different by giving the gift of vulnerability, thoughtfulness, and intimacy.
1. Recreate your first date
-
- Reminisce on what it was about your partner that really drew you to them from day one. Reflect on the life you built together, the good times and the bad. Reflecting and celebrating where you’ve been as a couple is a powerful way to reconnect with one another.
2. Ask for ways in which your (partner) best “receives love”.
-
- We all have human needs for love/affection/attention from our partners, however we all also have our own ways in which we share love, and there’s no guarantee this giving/receiving dynamic automatically aligns! Explicit conversations are incredibly helpful and necessary for long-term, satisfying, supportive relationships.
3. Spice up the bedroom, ask what turns your partner on!
-
- Initiating conversations about sexual desires/fantasies has long been a taboo subject (with dire consequences). A healthy and satisfying sex life can be a restorative and nourishing element of any relationship. Often getting to this point involves vulnerability and intentional communication, but there are tools to help with this! Consider a Yes/No/Maybe list to open the dialogue about uncomfortable yet important conversations… as Dr Emily Morse says, “Communication is Lubrication!”
4. Communicate an appreciation to your partner for all of the “little things” that they do that may be overlooked or taken for granted.
-
- We all have busy lives and it’s very easy to become desensitized to the “little things” that our partners do on a daily basis. Opening up this dialogue may even help your partner to communicate needs that they have/things they appreciate about you as well! Again, “Communication is Lubrication”!
5. A handwritten love letter
-
- The thoughtfulness and vulnerability that comes from a handwritten letter can not be matched. It is something that can be kept for years and re-read when the relationship gets a bit bumpy. It can be as long or as short as you’d like. If you do not have the words, find the words from poets. The best part about it? It’s FREE!
Valentine’s Day is the one day of the year where we intentionally shower the person we love with flowers, chocolates, diamonds, and the finest things. This Valentines Day why not try something that will last longer than flowers.
“There is no intimacy without vulnerability”- Brené Brow
